So, I had my monthly visit to the clinic today. I'd been meaning to discuss numerous things with the nurse practitioner and managed to forget each time. Thus, last night I wrote a list of things to discuss with her.
I get to the office and the regular nurse does her thing. I weighed in at a continually distressing 196. (Two meals a day and I still can't shake the weight.) My PB was 120 over 76...A touch higher than my normal 110 over 70. My pulse ox level was 98. And then she was about to leave, when she remembered to check my blood glucose. This was the one that threw us all for a loop. Instead of being a nice 70 or 80, or my normal 200 by the time I reach the clinic, my blood sugar was 54. FIFTY...FOUR. Despite it being so low, I felt fine. Still, the nurse rushed off to get me a piece of candy, which I ingested at her insistence.
Then the NP showed up, and I whipped out the list to discuss everything with her. And the two things that seemed to catch the most interest was the fact that I've been experiencing greater pain than ever before, and something about my left foot didn't look right.
Okay...the pain issue was fixed with an increase in my morphine. Mind you, the clinic folk weren't comfortable prescribing three tablets a day, so I've gone from 30 mg. three times a day to 60 mg. twice a day. It's still an increase, and it should offer me the relief I need.
The second thing...? Well, that's where the news isn't so great at all. My Charcot's joint may be advancing, and my left foot may be showing signs of visibly deforming. What's more, because I tend to walk in such a way as to keep the pressure off my right big toe, my right foot may also be "bowing," as she called it.
The time has come for x-rays to be taken of both feet to see what's going on in there. And because of pain I've been having in my knees, she decided we should try to get a look inside those as well.
I'm kinda scared, folks. Have you ever seen an x-ray of someone with Charcot's foot? Go ahead and look around online. It looks a great deal like the bones become one giant bone - singular - inside the foot, which leads to extensive soft tissue damage. The body desperately tries to fix the foot after the damage has already been done, and a bony protrusion breaking the skin is not uncommon. Ulcers, infection, and amputation are also common. And I have a growing dread that this is where my health, or lack thereof, is taking me.
And this is great...having written the words, I'm now more conscious of the problem than ever before. I'm off unwind.
PS: No responses to my computer woes, other than Lou saying there's nothing she can do. I understand that, the love I'll never have. =P But thanks for the thought.