Tuesday, May 18, 2010

With just a dash of guilt...

It's a common ingredient when it comes to the events of my life. No matter what going on in my life, be it good or bad, I end up feeling guilty for not being there for others when it's fairly obvious they could use my aid.

While Becky's been here, I've at least peeked at some of the threads on GitP. What te4nds to make me feel worst is when I see there's a fresh post on the Depression Thread. Short...Long...Something in between. It doesn't matter. When I see someone has posted, I have a desire to respond.

But to sit here and spend an hour or two crafting a response to someone's venting means time away from Becky, and she's leaving next Sunday, (possibly Monday, as has been "threatened").

"That's okay, Rob. We know she lives far away, and you want to spend as much time with her as possible. Still, we are kind of wondering how or why it is that you take the time to make a blog post. Care to unravel that little mystery?" Oh, sure. No problem at all. I've been posting to my blog to feed my ego. And how does posting to my blog feed my ego? Well, it's been stated several times that Becky reads this blog. What hasn't been stated is exactly how much she likes reading it. She LOVES reading this thing. That's because I use plenty of humor along the way, as well as give her further insight into what I've been thinking. It's been a great deal of fun for me to tell her I've posted, she hops online to read, and then I get to watch her smile, or hear her laugh and ask what tickled her fancy. That she enjoys reading my ramblings makes me feel good in many ways.

At the mention of posting, either later today or tomorrow, there will be an update on my medical stuff, as well as several things Becky and I have been discussing over the last few days. Being alone, without the interrupting sounds of someone using the bathroom right next to my room has offered us a much greater chance to discuss numerous things that could be deemed quite serious. In fact, I was free enough with my emotions last night where the tears started to flow from me...

...which tends to make Becky cry, as well. I think her tears ducts are directly linked to mine. My guess it's a radio transmission of some kind, since it seems to happen when I'm in KS and she's in PA.

And that's it for the moment. I need to get ready for my wound care followup. Posting again soonish. Be well. =)

No comments: