Sunday, May 29, 2011

Behind every good man... an even better woman.

Becky and I were out of town for just over 24 hours, visiting her family. A barbeque was planned for today, but with my foot being what it is, we decided to head there a day early. The original plan was that we'd get there, pay for a motel room for the night, then I'd collapse while she went off to spend some time at her mom's place.

The problem with abandoning Becky so I could stay behind is that it just seems to reminiscent of her ex, Shawn. He was a severely antisocial cretin, and it seemed too much like I'd be dismissing her so she could visit, while I avoided the whole thing. I'm perpetually attempting to seem as though I'm nothing like this particular nightmare ex of hers.

So we visited. And while we were there, we brought the gift of dirty laundry. Hey, 'Nita has a washer and dryer at her place, and we had nothing clean left to wear. It all seemed to work out when Becky and I considered it. And what future in-law doesn't love it when you come by with clothing that needs washed.

We spent plenty of time at 'Nita's house. Several hours, in fact. Alas, her dryer seems to be on its way out, and our laundry still wasn't done by the time I had to pack it in. I actually wouldn't have minded staying longer, but my schedule seems to be dictated by my right foot of late.

Back to the room we went, and...Well, I have to tell you, it was quite the fight, behaving ourselves as we did. We have to, as we don't want my foot exploding on us or anything. Still, engaging in "extracurricular activities" in a motel seems...I dunno...almost like we had to run off somewhere because what we wanted was "bad." And "bad," in this case, meant "fun." But we behaved...dangit!

Upon waking this morning, Becky went off to get our clothes while I became a human being. Give me just a little heat and a lot of humidity, and I shvitz like there's no tomorrow. The shower I took eventually seemed wasted, as I only did more sweating as the day went on.

Knowing food was coming our way, we stopped for a little snack. And then we went and bought the most wonderful thing one can have during summer in a relatively small apartment: AN AIR CONDITIONER! At last, I wouldn't have to rely on the circulation fan above the bed to cool me off. We would have cold air pumping into the main room when we got home.

Then it was off to Becky's grandfather's place for the family gathering. Like most families, Becky's is filled with its unique characters. The great thing is that they seem to accept me, and have not been comparing me to any of Becky's exes. Still, I've been making the effort to make sure there's no mistake in that regard. Where Shawn would grunt replies to questions and do as much as possible to avoid interacting with anyone in her family, I talked to everyone, including the precocious four-year-old who made what seemed an entirely too adult effort to engage me in small talk. This didn't quite work, as the world is a very simple place when one is a child. For example, her attempt at conversation led to the large CAM walker on my right foot. She asked where I got it from, and I told her that a doctor gave it to me. As though this was a present I'd received, she said, "That's nice."

There were other kids around as well, and I'm astounded some of them have lasted as long as they have. I mean, one of Becky's cousin's is 13 years old. Upon learning I was Jewish, she turned and asked excitedly, "You're Jewish?!? DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE HOLOCAUST?!?" Such a brilliant statement begged for sarcasm in return, and I laid it on thick.

This, of course, led me to telling the worst Jewish joke I know. It was meant for the adults, but I told the kids that were around us, including the genius 13-year-old, that they were not to repeat the joke under ANY circumstances. And I warned them that if they tell it, someone could take offense and there could be A LOT of trouble. What's the first thing the kid does when I'm done? Run outside to her adults who didn't hear the joke to say, "I know a funny joke that I can't tell you." This particular child...She's going to have to start all of her sentences with "Duhhh," just to be sure people are forewarned that what she's going to say is stupid.

But aside from all of the mini-adventures I experienced today, there were the few times that Becky thanked me for traveling the two hours from home to visit with family. She acted as though I'd done something extraordinary, when all I did was spend time with my fiancee and her loved ones.

And I don't think Becky gets it. I'm not sure if she ever will. She's it. I'm done searching for someone special. If this doesn't work out, I'm giving up the chase, as I'm in no shape to keep it up. She is not the first, but she is my last and best choice. And without her, I would have started becoming unglued. She's the one who's been holding me together since things with my Charcot's foot have gotten serious. She's the driving force behind my wanting to get better, and to improve whatever it is that I am. Whenever Becky and I are together, that's the place I call "home." Many have told me that I'm a good man, but Becky is the far better woman that's keeping me together, and that's a fact.

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